As I sit down to blog this morning, I an watching my now 4 year old in her Strawberry Shortcake Dress and playing with football stickers. Yes that is who she is! Would play soccer in a dress if I let her! Wynleah Grace is now 4 years old. We always say, where did the time go. As I look back on the last four years, God has taken our family through valleys and mountains I would have never even looked at on my own. Wynleah was our sweet answer to our daughters 1 year prayer for a baby sister. We have not allowed our son to pray for another baby brother!!lol She looks like her big sisters twin, and she has the personality of the strongest, lovingness, and just down right friendly life of the house daily.
As we had to make more than one transition over the past four years, she has hung in there better than even us adults at adjusting and just being happy to be in our family. She sees the positive and finds the funny! God new what he had planned in the answer to prayers. He new what she would bring to our lives and what was a head the next four years for her to endure.
I never new how much love you can have for a person until Arianna was born. I thought how could I love something this much. I just never wanted to put her down or let her go. I feel that way everyday that I see my now 10 year old young lady grow up. Then to be blessed with another baby, who God wanted to bring to heaven with him before we could meet him. That love you have before you ever hold a baby, that love you have never holding that baby, and the heartache you feel daily not having him with you. To say that I have gotten to a place of contentment in where our baby is and missing him, would be close to accurate. Then after being told no more children. Our sweet little girl prayed every night for a baby sister. When there is no earthly way, God makes a way. Wynleah was planned to be our Christmas baby in 2009. She arrived on Nov 30th in her own time and fashion! But let me back up a couple years to our sooo handsome and amazing young man, our son Hunter. He arrived with a big tug, he was in no hurry to get here. He is still that way. He does things in his own time and his own pattern. If you change that he melts. He is the biggest introvert in our home. But we never see that, we only see this loving and amazing brother and son. The world outside of home is just a little overboard for him. Simple! So smart and a quick learner. Our family is complete. We are trucking a long and making ends meet.
God moved us! Not to a new house or new job. To a new town. Where you know no one and have to use a GPS to find the grocery store or PO. It was the first time, I think ever I didn't panic! I didn't fall apart in tears! I didn't get a headache from worry! I was at peace with the move, the new job, and the new possibilities. My only tears shed where of those of missing our amazing friends and life and our church family.
We have since been searching for a new church family to call home. We have visited several and we have been invited to some great bodies of believers. We have found one recently that we all feel great about and are really enjoying worship with them. We are following Gods lead on this one. But I was sitting in service and the pastor asked us to email him one word to describe the manger scene. And it hit me, of all the words you can use, salvation, amazing, awesome, peace, joy, love, eternity, God, and so many more. I actually had one word to share with him. CONTENTMENT.
By its definition, are any of us ever content? Our food is right, our clothes don't fit, our boss is difficult , our kids don't mind, that group is wrong, this place is awful, etc.
True contentment comes from one place, one person, one spirit. From Christ. To be able to sit back take a polaroid of your life every 10 minutes. To see God at work in every minute of every day. To loves others, because you are loved. To have peace in your heart and your home. To be a fruit of the spirit as you walk and talk. To share the grace you have received with others. Really and truly, okay ready for this take a deep breath and the elephant of stress and worry is gone. To just smile all day because it is easy to do. To look at your husband and see all the good in him and not what irritates you. To watch your children and feel truly happy inside to see them just being them. To me moved from everyone you know and start a knew, and not panic when the car breaks down, or you get lost, or you change school plans, or you meet new friends, you step out of your comfort zone. To look forward to breakfast and dinner with the whole family just to hear them laugh and smile. To be able to have the children who will pray with you before starting each and every school day. Oh all the ways I could go on and on...
Who knew that moving where I knew no one, and use GPS to get around daily, would bring on this true amazing contentment. I find myself just walking through the house while everyone is asleep and looking around and just looking up and smiling at our God!
I have prayed about being in content in the Lord. To be able to feel what that feels like and to be able to see that answer to pray is indescribable! Finding contentment in the unknown.
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